Are you awaiting your first kiss? The first kiss is often magical, a moment when your emotions are going haywire and your eye contact alone indicates how much the two of you want each other. This intimate experience can make time stand still…and that can be either in a good way or a bad way! No two first kisses are alike. They can be romantic, embarrassing, sweet, or downright silly. If you are in a long term relationship, you might be thinking the time is nigh for your first real kiss.
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How Does Kissing for the First Time Feel Like?
If you are on the cusp of your first real kiss, you might be wondering what exactly makes a kiss a good kiss – and what a first kiss feels like. You might be nervous, feeling as though your heart is going to beat out of your chest, or you may want to avoid the situation altogether. But don’t! Just stay calm. These feelings of nervousness are totally normal, as are all of the feelings we will talk about in this article.
Prepare for spontaneity
If you have been planning that perfect kiss for months, know that the perfect kiss might not happen just as you have planned it. Your first kiss is likely to happen any way except exactly as how you have planned it. It could happen at your house, at a party, on the bus, on a school day, on a weekend night, or at any other time or place. There is really no telling when or where! However, you don’t need to know – often, the romance of the situation is created in this spontaneity.
You will definitely be nervous
The first kiss can be a totally nerve-wracking experience but relax! Things won’t necessarily be perfect, and that is okay. Chances are, the person you are about to kiss is just as nervous, too. No matter what happens, try to stay calm.
There might be a lot of awkwardness (or even sweating!) between the two of you before that first kiss happens. You probably won’t know what to do with your hands and you might just end up awkwardly shifting your body back and forth while you wait for the other person to give you a sign. Try to relax, though, because this is probably his first time kissing, too. The nerves will be there, but try to shake them off and go for it anyway.
The other person might not reciprocate right away
You can take charge and make the first move, but the other person might be thrown off guard and appear shocked or even taken aback. They might not reciprocate instantly. Don’t feel as though your advances have been denied. Instead, keep leaning in, plant a light kiss, and go with it.
You may feel a ton of adrenaline
When you have that first kiss, you might experience quite a few funny feelings. Your adrenaline might go up and your heart rate will definitely increase. Even your breathing might seem to be getting heavier. Don’t let it stress you out, you are not going to die! Your body is simply experiencing some serious excitement and nerves. Don’t panic and just enjoy the rush.
You might tilt your head the same way
Here is a funny situation that is common for first-time kissers: if neither of you has ever kissed before, you might both fumble the kiss by tilting your head in the same direction. Don’t feel embarrassed – this is a cute little mishap that many first-timers experience.
Prepare for your body to respond
When you lean in for that first kiss, there is going to be a lot of dodgy stuff going on with you. Not only will you have a lot of strange things happening to your body, but your brain is going to go into overdrive.
First, the dopamine (or pleasure neurotransmitter) in your brain is going to start shooting off signals to the rest of your body. This is a super pleasurable feeling and quickly, all of those negative feelings of stress and anxiety will start to slide away. Instead, the dopamine will activate all the other hormones in your pituitary gland, letting them know that you are connecting with another individual.
You might accidentally hurt each other
If you lean in and bump foreheads, faces, or noses, don’t panic. This is quite possible and often, it happens when one of you comes in either too slow or too fast. The bump can also happen when you tilt your head in the same direction. Treat this as the funny situation that it is and it is nothing to worry over for sure!
Consider using chapstick or lip balm
Nobody wants to kiss somebody with dry, chapped lips! Make sure your lips are nice and moisturized by using a chapstick or lip balm before the kiss. You should avoid ones with too much flavor, as it can be distracting. Also, some guys are usually not fond of the taste of chapsticks or they could be allergic. Instead, just choose a neutral flavor and apply it before that kiss so your lips are nice and smooth. You can even lick your lips to moisturize them but don’t do this excessively, just enough to wet your lips.
Don’t expect something intense and dramatic as your first kiss is more likely to just be sweet, tender, and overwhelmingly soft. Your kisses will likely intensify as the two of you develop a relationship inside the bedroom but right now, you are just in exploratory mode. Enjoy it!
If it is your first kiss, it is normal for the kiss to be closed – just a little peck. As you get more experienced, you may begin to explore “french kissing,” which is done with an open mouth and is usually reserved for people with more experience. Keep your expectations low for the first few kisses!
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Expect to feel happy, too
Even though you will have plenty of nervousness, you will likely feel happy during the kiss, as well as when it is over. Kissing is one of the best ways to reduce stress, since you will be so excited and you will feel completely at ease when the kiss is done. Not only can kissing make you feel good about yourself, but it can also improve your mood.
In fact, there are a lot of studies that suggest couples who kiss often are more likely to have happier relationships. You might feel excited and giggle a lot once the first kiss is done. You will also probably feel super silly just for worrying about the kiss in the first place!
Don’t expect anything fancy
Fancy kissing techniques, like lip biting, probably won’t happen during that first kiss. These sorts of things are usually reserved for more advanced couples. Unless your partner has more experience, you will probably both stay away from lip nibbling or lip biting. Don’t worry about whether this will happen during a first kiss because chances are, it won’t.
It could be over and done with very quickly
Unless you two engage in tongue action – which isn’t likely to happen – you are probably going to find that it is over and done with much faster than you anticipated. Even if it only lasts for a few seconds, though, it will probably be carved into your memory as one of the most romantic and memorable moments of all time. Now remember, those romantic and slow-motion kissing scenes you see in the movies may seem to last forever, but in real life, you might just get a brief liplock when you do it for the first time.
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Don’t rush things
Sure, it is not going to last forever, but that does not mean that you need to rush things. Don’t feel guilty about stopping to savor the moment. If the mood is right, you might be able to go for a gentle French kiss. Just see how things work and don’t try to rush things. And if you do happen to move things more quickly than you had originally planned, don’t stress about that, either. Remember, there will always be a second, third, and fourth kiss for you to try things again.
Enjoy the laughing and giggling
Especially afterward! Your first kiss is something to be enjoyed. You are going to have a unique blend of emotions, anxiety, fumbling, and most of all, happiness. You may feel jolts of romantic happiness for hours or even days after the kiss.
Add a bit of pressure
When you kiss, add a little bit of pressure, but not too much. You don’t want the kiss to be so soft that the other person can’t feel it, but you also don’t want to smash your lips together. Instead, look for a combination of the two, adding just the right amount of pressure for the kiss to be felt and to be meaningful.
The tongue can make things sloppy
Usually, there won’t be any tongue action on that first kiss. However, if the kiss moves beyond into a sloppy makeout session, well, then that tongue might come out. This will depend on your personal style and your desire for intimacy. Just remember that as the tongues explore mouths and you two get more intimate, the kiss is going to go from dry to sloppy very quickly and yup, you might even get spit on your face!
It will be unlike anything you have ever expected
No matter how many movies you have watched or how much you have fantasized about that first kiss, it is probably going to be nothing like what you had practiced for. As with any type of intimacy, the magic of your first real kiss is going to be there but it is probably going to take its own path. Don’t let yourself be disappointed by expectations that don’t match up with reality!
After all, your life is not a movie. You should share your first kiss with someone you feel strongly about, but don’t let your expectations outweigh the beauty of reality.
Final Advice About the First Kiss
The first kiss should be fun! It can be easy to overthink your first kiss when you don’t have a lot of experience but try not to take yourself too seriously. If you like someone and they like you back, then they will know it is your first time kissing and they will go easy on you. Plus, if you and the guy you are kissing are physically attracted to each other, that kiss is going to be great no matter what.
So, stop getting all stressed and just go for it!