We live in a digital age where almost everything can be done over the internet. You can buy close to anything on Amazon, read e-books, and even meet someone online. If you have been looking for a relationship in recent years, chances are you have tried online dating before.
I have used a number of dating apps off and on. When I got a match the first time, I was over the moon thinking that I had met “the one.” His picture showed a very handsome man with a dashing smile and chatting with him through the app was pleasant enough. When I finally met him in person, expecting to be swept off my feet, he turned out to have lied about his age and was much older than what I was led to believe. Needless to say, the romantic first date I thought I would have turned into a disaster.
Now let’s be honest. Online dating can get pretty awkward and uncomfortable when you first meet your match in real life. This is especially true if they do not turn out to be what you had expected. Without having met someone face to face before, it can be difficult to accurately determine if you are compatible in real life. However, it is possible to get a grasp of who your match truly is before setting up a date to meet face to face. Here are 17 essential questions for you to ask your match that could help you decide if it is the right time to take the next step.
Online Dating Questions to Ask before Meeting
1. What do you think of in the morning to help you get out of bed?
This is a safe question to ask as a conversation starter. Knowing what motivates a person can tell you a lot about them and how they think. Not only that, this is a much more interesting first question to ask than “Hi, how are you?”
2. What inspired you to create a profile here?
This is a great question to determine if your match is serious about looking for a long-term relationship or just wants a quick fling. It is best to tell each other your true intentions for joining the online dating platform right from the start to weed out those with a different purpose from yours.
3. Can you describe what a typical Saturday night for you is like?
This is a great question to find out if your match is a party person, chill-at-home type, or something else without asking them about it outright. There isn’t really a right or wrong answer here, and it all boils down to what your own preference is.
4. Who is your biggest role model?
Knowing who someone looks up to will tell you a lot about what they aspire to be. Sometimes, it can give you an idea about this person’s political views, religious beliefs, or other crucial information you need to know to determine if you are compatible.
5. What do you think is your strangest talent?
Another great question to break the ice and get to know your match in a fun way. It can be quite entertaining to discover what they believe is the talent they have that distinguishes them. If they are willing to tell you about it, you know that they are at least welcoming and open.
6. Pick one, skydiving or swimming with sharks?
Slot in some random and unexpected questions to keep the conversation interesting. The answers will likely be quite entertaining, and you might even learn about his or her fears in a lighthearted way.
7. Which college did you go to and what’s the reason you chose that school?
Most profiles on a dating app or website do not display their education background. How your match answers this question will tell you a bit about their priorities in life. Did they attend an ivy league school? Or did they go to a college more known for parties?
8. Which is your favorite book, movie or television show?
A classic question that everyone will have an answer to and enjoy telling others about. You can follow up the question by asking them why they like the book, movie, or television show to get to know them even more. If both of you have the same tastes, you can be quite certain that you will at least have a good topic to talk about on your first real date.
9. What are some of your hobbies?
Knowing what your match does during his or her free time could help you decide if you are compatible with each other. For example, if they love cats and are inseparable from them, but you are allergic to cats, then you might have a problem.
10. Is there anything in particular about my profile that caught your eye?
Knowing what they liked about your profile can help you better understand what their true intention in joining the online dating platform was. If they focus on your physical looks too much, it may mean that they are just looking for a hook-up and not interested in getting to know you as a person.
11. Do you have any religious beliefs?
This is not a question you should ask right at the beginning of a conversation as some people might find it rather sensitive. If you feel that your match is quite open to talking about him or herself, then you can ask if they are religious to find out whether their values align with yours.
12. What is your favorite drink when you are out at a bar?
Knowing what your match’s go-to drink is can tell you if you will be getting your own drinks or splitting a bottle of wine together. He or she might not even drink any alcohol at all, so this is important information to help you decide if you want to set up a first date with that person.
13. Is there a cause that you are passionate about?
Not only will you find out where your match’s passion lies, but it is always great to hear someone talk about something they strongly believe in. Even if it is through chatting over the internet, when someone feels strongly about something, their texts will emanate passion.
14. Do you see your family often?
Should you be really serious about looking for a long-term relationship, you definitely want to see if your values are compatible. Do not be afraid to talk about the future with your match, and if you scare them away with serious questions, at least you know that they are not ready for a long-term relationship.
15. What is your ultimate vacation like?
Traveling together is always a good way to test your relationship. But before you even meet with your online match, find out how they like to travel to understand if you both like to visit the same types of places or not. If you’d rather bathe in the warm sunshine on a tropical beach while they prefer to go on a skiing vacation, you might not be the most compatible with each other.
16. Tell me the most embarrassing thing you have ever done.
Let’s bring the conversation back to a lighter note. Embarrassing stories are a great way to lighten the mood and have a great laugh together. Make sure you share your own story too and see how they react to it.
17. What do you think your biggest accomplishment is so far?
When you shine the spotlight on your match and let them brag about themselves, it is a great way to see how they behave. Are they modest about their accomplishments or do they come across as full of themselves?
Tell us about your experience with online dating and if you have anything to add to our list of essential questions!