I miss you!
That’s not so hard, right?
Wrong. Telling someone those three tiny words is a lot harder than it might seem. Knowing exactly how to tell someone that you miss them or want to spend more time with them can be seriously stress-inducing, if not downright impossible! After all, what if the other person doesn’t share your feelings or worse, things you are being clingy?
Regardless of whether you have been dating someone for a few months or even just a few weeks, telling someone that you want to see them more often than you already are can be extremely scary. Even if you have been in a relationship for several years and just feel distant from your partner, this can be a daunting proposition. You need to be specific and careful with your word choice or else you risk portraying the wrong idea.
Nevertheless, it is important to be honest. To start, consider the nature of your relationship and think about what the big picture might be. Then, you will be able to truly express your feelings.
How to Tell Someone You Miss Them in Different Situations
1) When you haven’t been dating for very long
This is one of the toughest dating conversations to have. Telling the person that you are seeing that you miss them and want to see them more often can be scary! It could take your relationship to the next level, or it can be a death sentence.
However, by being upfront, you remove a lot of the risk. Be straightforward and text you partner the words, ‘I miss you.’ This is bold, but it is also a great way to determine whether you and the person you love share the same feelings. If he or she misses you back, then you will know that your relationship is headed down the right path.
If being direct isn’t for you, know that you have other choices, too. You can say something like, “I have been thinking about you” or “I can’t wait until the next time I see you.” You could even tell the person about how you can’t seem to get them out of your head! The bottom line here is that you have plenty of options.
You could even send a good night or good morning text – even just by sending a hug or kiss emoji right in the middle of the day. When they ask why, just tell them that you were thinking of them. Keep it simple. The worst case scenario is that your text goes unanswered – at least then, you will know where you stand.
2) When you miss your girlfriend or boyfriend
If you miss your boyfriend or girlfriend and want to let them know, saying the words, “I miss you,” can really strengthen the relationship. Whether your partner is away on vacation or business, telling them that you miss them will make their day and also let them know how special they are to you.
It can be tough to find a way to say “I miss you” that is not generic. However, telling your partner that you miss their closeness or their smile or something else that is specific to your own relationship is a good idea. The two of you likely have things that only you as a couple know – as well as your own inside jokes! So, it can be helpful to cite those now.
You can even send a selfie every now and then or ask your partner to send you one in return. It doesn’t have to be dirty, either! You can simply send your boyfriend or girlfriend a picture of our face or ask for a picture of a place that is more symbolic to the two of you.
3) When you are in a long-distance relationship
We won’t sugarcoat it – long-distance relationships are hard. Telling your partner that you miss them constantly can become not only redundant, but downright annoying. Therefore, it is important that you communicate the fact that you miss your partner by telling them as such in a more unique way.
For example, you can choose FaceTime instead of calling your partner. This will allow you to feel closer and more united even if you are thousands of miles apart. Calling to mind the special moments the two of you have shared can also help. If you can tell your partner what you love about them most, reminding them how much you cherish those moments, it will not only make your partner feel more special, but it will help to make your time apart more manageable.
If you are feeling old-fashioned, you might even want to consider sending a personalized letter or postcard. It could say “I miss you” at the end or you could let it do all the talking for itself. This is a great way to surprise your partner, as is sending flowers, chocolate, or something else that you know he or she will absolutely adore.
4) When you have a crush on someone far away
Telling someone you miss them isn’t always about telling someone you are in a relationship that information. Sometimes, you might be wondering whether you should tell the person you miss that you even miss them at all! In fact, you could be falling for someone and not know what to do because you aren’t in a relationship with them.
The question here isn’t just about how to tell someone you miss them, but whether you should tell them at all. This is a very individualized situation. If you are saying you miss someone early on, before you are together, this can be quite risky. It is best to take things slowly and let this information come out on its own, at its own pace. You may want to choose more subtle alternatives in telling this person that you miss them.
- Discover More: How To Talk To Your Crush And What Topics You Should Cover
For example, you might want to post a Facebook or Instagram story that is somehow related to something that the two of you discussed. There could be a hidden meaning that only the two of you will understand.
Alternatively, you might want to put up a YouTube video of a song that you both like. You could post a picture of a place that you have been wanting to visit, or you can tell them you can’t wait to see them – this is similar to saying that you miss someone, but is a little less direct and forthcoming.
5) When you miss someone who is already right there
This is the hardest situation to be in when you are trying to figure out how to tell someone you miss them. To be close yet far away from another person, to be able to look at this person, to sleep beside them each night and yet feel far enough away to miss them…that is truly heartbreaking.
It is not uncommon for couples who have been in longer relationships – or even those who are already married – to begin to take each other for granted or even have some resentments. You might forget the importance of spending time together. Who can blame you? Things get hectic and your work can be overwhelming. However, it is important that you call to mind the importance of your relationship and try to make some alone time for the two of you.
How do you tell someone whom you are already with that you miss them? Simple. You need to communicate. You should try to tell them everything you are thinking at that moment without holding back. After all, you can’t expect them to know what you are feeling if you don’t tell them, right? Make sure that you tell your partner how much you miss them and let them know what you think can be done to solve this longing.
Our Top Tips for Telling Someone You Miss Them
There is no set formula for how you should tell someone that you miss them. However, what follows are some good tips on telling someone you miss them and to encourage a positive response each and every time.
#1 Get in the right state of mind
You need to go into this conversation from a positive place. If you start off the conversation by already feeling clingy, there is a good chance that this impression you have will rub off on the person you are talking to. You need to make sure the other person doesn’t perceive you this way and the best way to do this is to go into the talk from a good headspace.
#2 Accept vulnerability
Nobody is perfect and being vulnerable isn’t a sign of your faults, but a sign of your humanity. Showing your vulnerability will show the other person that you are courageous and are open about sharing your needs. Your feelings are legitimate – you do not need to be shy about expressing them.
#3 Have an idea of what to say
Have a clear vision of what you want to say, committing your ideas to memory if possible. This will prevent you from becoming flustered or upset. Remember to use “I” in all of your statements – this is the secret to a happy relationship as it will allow you to express your feelings without pressuring your partner.
#4 Be direct and open
There is nothing wrong with being direct, especially if you are talking to your partner. Knowing what you are going to say and having a clear idea of how to communicate it is key. Be succinct and let your partner know exactly what you want. Tell them what you need from them and how the two of you can improve your relationship through this kind of direct communication
#5 Be prepared
When you tell someone you miss them, it is not unlike other types of communication you have with your partner about your relationship. You are naturally going to be opening the door to conversations about other types of relationship issues, too.
Ideally, your partner will understand where you are coming from and you will be able to move forward together and resolve the issue of you missing each other too much. Sadly, though, the conversation won’t always work that way for there is a chance that the two of you won’t see eye-to-eye. Remember that it is always good to communicate, though, even if you don’t get the reaction that you wanted.
After all, there is no point spending any more time missing someone who doesn’t miss you back.
- Discover more: 23 PROVEN Tips to Make Her Miss You