How To Keep Your Long Distance Friendships From Petering Out

friendship long distance

Your best friend moving away does not have to be the end of the friendship. Here are some ideas that are very easy to carry out to maintain your friendship, even when you are living apart.

Be patient

Understand that communicating with your friend will have to be different now. You cannot expect a reply within minutes after you have texted them. Sometimes, your friend might be taking a bit of time to write a detailed response to a message like “Hey, what have you been up to?” because unlike before, you did not spend the entire day together. Avoid sending text after text asking for your friend to respond or worse, accusing them of not caring about you. Being annoying is definitely one way to get on your friend’s nerves.

Treat scheduled video calls with the utmost importance

You might get the idea that a video call is not as important as a physical meet-up. However, with a huge distance between you and your friend, a video call is the closest thing you can have to hanging out together because you do not get to see each other physically. Try to make the call in a timely manner as it could be difficult to reschedule the video call, especially if there’s a time difference involved. While it is understandable that sometimes unexpected things could make you break your video chat date, do try your best to respect your friend’s time and do not postpone a scheduled video chat just because you are tired from work.

Do not live in the past

It is very easy to fall into the trap of living in the past when your friend has moved away. While it is nice to sometimes relive the good times you have had together, you should get to know what your friend is doing in the now too. Talk about the past sometimes but also update each other about important things in your current life like work, relationships, etc.

Be in touch as much as you can

To maintain your friendship, it is important that you are part of each other’s daily life. If you only check in when there is some big news to share, you will eventually drift apart. It is the little things that count and knowing the smallest details of each other’s life will make it seem like you are not really separated by distance. Tell your friend about your new favorite café or that cute boy you have just met.

Send an email when you have a long story to tell

When you cannot seem to find a suitable time for a lengthy video call, but you have a great story to tell your friend, email is your best tool since texting is more suitable for short messages. You can tell your friend all about the new job you have found or someone that you have just started dating without leaving out any juicy details. You do not need to worry about sounding longwinded because your friend will certainly want to hear everything you can tell about your exciting story.

Pictures are worth a thousand words

If you ran out of things to say but still want to keep in touch with your friend, why not send them a picture? You can even start a new conversation by sending them a picture of the dinner you have made or the result of the new makeup tip you have tried out.

Prepare for your video chats

When something interesting happens but you cannot talk to your friend about it immediately, you can jot it down on a notebook or on your phone. When you think of something your friend might want to hear about, record it down. Then, the next time you have a video chat with each other, you can bring out your notes so that your friend does not miss out on all the interesting things that have been happening around you.

Follow your friend’s social media posts

You can keep yourself updated on your friend’s life by reading their posts on social media. Instead of just wondering what they are up to, why not stalk their social media accounts and then send them a text asking about what you have read?

Watch the same TV shows

Look up a show that you think both of you will like. Then, have movie dates where you watch the same episode together and talk about it later. You can even share a Netflix account to ensure that both of you have access to the same shows.

Write letters

In the modern age that we live in, almost nobody writes letters anymore. Because of this, it will mean so much more if you can write something thoughtful and send it to your friend in the mail as a surprise. A handwritten letter is so much more personal and intimate than emails that can sometimes appear cold and impersonal.

Send them some coffee money

Occasionally send some small money to your friend via a money sending app like PayPal so that they can treat themselves to a well-deserved coffee or snack. You can be sure that your friend will appreciate this a lot and makes for a great excuse for them to treat themselves once in a while.

Send them small gifts

If you see something nice that you know your friend will love, like a trinket at a flea market or some special spices you came across at the farmer’s market, then you should purchase them. Since you probably won’t see your friend physically in a while, send the small treasure you found in the mail and put a smile on their face.

Play games together online

Playing games is great to establish a connection with your friend without the need for a conversation. There are many games that you can play together online. You will surely find something that both of you will enjoy ranging from casual games like “Draw With Friends” to hardcore games like “World of Warcraft.”

Include your friend in your social media posts

Keep your friend in both your real and social media lives. Tag your friend in a post that you think will interest them or you can just keep it casual and tag them in a cute animal picture. Anything at all works here, and this helps remind your friend that they are always on your mind.

Feature your friend on Throwback Thursdays #tbt

Once in a while, make your friend the subject of your #tbt photos and write a short comment with it. While you should not live in the past, nostalgia is a great way to help both of you appreciate the fantastic memories and good times you have had together.

Count on your friend

When you find yourself in need of a confidence boost or you are feeling particularly lonely, do not be afraid to reach out to your friend. The fact that you cannot take a short walk and knock on their front door anymore does not mean that they cannot still be your pillar of support. Send them a text and ask if they have time for a video chat or even a quick phone call. Letting your friend know that they are needed will keep both of you connected.

Plan together for a visit

Just like in any long distance relationship, it is crucial to be able to look forward to the next time you can meet in person. Planning your next visit will be fun, not to mention the excitement that gets built up from that.

Find a middle ground

If you and your friend are too far apart, you could meet each other halfway. Find a place that is between you and your friend’s place and meet up there. So, instead of one person driving 6 hours to see the other, it is more manageable when it’s just a 3-hour drive each.

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