You have been in a long distance relationship for a while and have not seen your partner for quite some time. You notice that you are growing apart from each other but it is not just because of the distance. You have made new friends or found something stimulating outside of your relationship and have been unconsciously distancing yourself from your partner. However, you know deep down that if you ever lose your partner (which is likely if things keep going the way they are), you will never feel complete. Even worse, the thought of your partner not being there for you will make you feel lonely and you really do not want to be in that dark place.
Many long distance relationships tend to dwindle and even end because of this. Some couples experience a slow but steady phase of the relationship dying while there are LDRs that just abruptly end without much warning. Nevertheless, whenever a serious relationship ends, it will almost always cause many heartbreaks and sadness.
If your long distance relationship has not ended yet but is heading that way, you can still turn it around. Read on to find out what are the things you can do to rescue your relationship and it might even end up better than before!
How To Save A Long Distance Relationship
Meet up in person
Perhaps the easiest way to save a dying long distance relationship is to try and rekindle that physical affection with each other that has been missing in both you and your partner’s life. More often than not, the main reason an LDR is failing is because you are just missing each other a lot. However, it might be too difficult to admit it or you do not want to come across as demanding so your defence mechanism kicks in and you just do not talk about it. As a result, you may appear to be cold and uncaring to your partner and in turn, they do the same too.
This is the most common problem and also perhaps one of the easiest to fix. Simply visit your partner or meet up with them at a convenient venue. Spend some time together with just the two of you and connect. That just might be all you need to bridge the gap that has grown between you.
Mail a personal and special gift to your partner
If it is impossible to meet up physically in the near future, the next best thing is to send a special gift to your partner. It does not have to be an extravagant gift but it has to be something that holds a special meaning to your relationship.
You can write a song for your partner, send a USB stick with all the songs that you love to dance to as a couple, or even a photograph of the both of you together coupled with a loving message – let your creative juices flow. Because this is something very important, it is worth it to spend some time and effort to make it extra special. Your partner will notice it and it will show them that you are not just someone they occasionally talk to on the computer screen but a real person who cares about them.
Be open and sincere to your partner
Communication is the key to all relationships and a long distance one is no exception. If you are feeling any doubts or insecurity about your relationship, talk to your partner about it. Tell them what you are going through and keep your mind open to what they have to say about it. Do not get defensive and be as honest as you can.
Opening up to your partner about a problem in the relationship could be very difficult but it is vital to save the connection you have together. In fact, you should try to talk about it to your partner as soon as you can before the problem festers and becomes worse.
Understand and accept the challenges in a long distance relationship
If you went into a long distance relationship thinking that everything will be the same as a normal relationship, you will be sorely disappointed. Living so far apart and not being able to see your partner in person as often as you want means that you must sacrifice many things to make the relationship work.
You must be willing to accept and adjust to the changes that a long distance relationship will bring to your life. Your partner’s life cannot revolve around you and they must socialise, work, go to school, etc. without you being part of it. Being possessive and immature about this will bring destruction to your relationship, no matter how much you love each other.
Adjust to your new life and see new experiences in a positive way
Whether you are the one who has moved away or you are learning to deal with life without your partner by your side physically, there will be adjustments that you must make. The new environment could change you a lot and priorities will often shift. It is normal for long distance couples to be confused about the new change and might not know how to deal with it.
The only way to solve this is to just embrace the new changes but with a positive mindset. Do not let the stress of change wear you out. If you remain happy and positive in times of change, you will be the perfect friend and partner to your loved one and help them embrace the changes in their life.
Work harder on every aspect of your relationship
First of all, getting a long distance relationship to work is already quite challenging. Saving a dying long distance relationship will definitely require a lot of hard work. You will need to put in extra efforts to show your partner how much you care about them and that you really want the relationship to work.
Some of the things you can improve on are to spend more time on your partner, be extra caring in your conversations with them, send more loving messages to them every day, and send pictures to their phones along the day to help make them feel more involved in your life. Sometimes, it is the small things that count and doing this could eventually create a new-found bond between you and your partner.
Demonstrate to your partner that you are willing to wait for them
Showing your partner that you will wait for them even when there are many challenges to face will make them feel loved. This will assure them that you will always be there even when times are tough. Tell them that you understand this will not be an easy journey but you are willing to go through it because your partner is worth it.
Ask your friends who are in a long distance relationship for advice
It is always wise to learn from the experience of others so that you do not do things the hard way. If you have any friends who are in a happy long distance relationship or someone who has been through it, you could talk to them about your situation and ask for their opinions. It might be more helpful than getting some general advice online because your friends know you personally and perhaps even know your partner too. Therefore, they can give you customized tips on how to solve your problem according to your personality and preferences.
Unfortunately, love does not conquer all. To have a successful long distance relationship, you will need to consciously make the decision to love your partner and show them your love too. Keeping these feelings inside your mind will not help. Just keep motivating yourself and know that in the end, victory is much sweeter when you have worked so hard for it.